If you have never been enthusiastic about the “bullies” and always preferred men with a little tummy, you know – you are now in the trend. No longer do you have to painfully pick up the words to explain to their own tastes. Just tell me – “I am a lover dad bod». «Dad bod» comes from the American expression «dad’s body», which loosely translated means “daddy’s body.”
If you have never been enthusiastic about the “bodybuilding forums ” and always preferred men with a little tummy, you know – you are now in the trend. No longer do you have to painfully pick up the words to explain to their own tastes. Just tell me – “I am a lover dad bod». «Dad bod» comes from the American expression «dad’s body», which loosely translated means “daddy’s body.”
Holders of “daddy’s body” – a man who, maybe even once had a press with cubes. But now he disappeared under the soft folds of the planned beer belly. In general, if you always liked the man, “like a teddy bear,” which is a nice cuddle, soft and comfortable men – then you always enjoyed dad bod.
A month ago, no one thought of such formulations. But today, dad bod as a social phenomenon and sexual discussing all – men and women, and feminists and conservatives, and journalists, and network trolls. And all thanks to Mackenzie Pearson – Clemson University student who wrote an article titled “Why do girls like« dad bod ». This material has caused so much heated debate on the Internet, that we decided to ask – really, why? Psychologist Rina Moses helped us sort out this issue.
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Such a man was created for the family
Beside him comfortably, safely, comfortably. And most importantly – safe. “Teddy,” a man perceived as a family type. There, the term includes the word “Daddy” – and it gives hope that the man will treat you as a loving father to his daughter. I will take care of you and protect from adversity, to indulge. Especially when in reality your father was far from ideal. Then the offense is doubled: to get in one person adult man for himself, and his father – a little for themselves.
It seems that the owner of “daddy’s body” more likely than narcissistic Narcissus-like, would be to nail shelves meet you after work and drive the child to kindergarten. Unfortunately, this is an illusion. On the basis of the appearance and attitude of the body is impossible to build reliable forecasts of how to behave towards men. The same jock can fall in love with her baby in a logical continuation of themselves and devote all his time to it. A “plush” man on the spot is quite capable of sexual tummy grow huge belly, which will hinder him get up from the couch.
With such a man to have fun
However, the owner of “daddy’s body” can eat two pizzas range at 11 pm, to be filled up with a pack of crisps on the sofa and watch TV show. Unlike amateur HLS it will not be every day to get up at six in the morning, run to the gym and do not fill up your kitchen with their protein shakes and other sports nutrition. Unlike skinny vegan raw foodists, or it will not be all the time to chew some seeds germinated, give up your culinary delights and meditate twice a day.
“Teddy,” a man never blame you for the following six-eaten piece of cake. Is that if you do not share a dessert with it. This boyfriend would not blame you for missing a run, he will gladly replace the morning jogging in morning sex. The man with the belly will be the usual – in the best sense of the word. Together with him you can do ordinary things and obtain their usual fun.
Unfortunately, this simple human pleasures can become routine and boring quickly. What happens if you suddenly want to spend time more dynamic, diverse, with the use or just different? Winner of “daddy’s body” can not cope with the new challenges.
Such a man is sexy
“Spineless” a man is not only associated with some psychological makeup of the individual, but also a sexual type. On the men’s preferences written much, and we are happy to read the article to know: what women like a strong half. We are doing it in the hope of finding the “magic button”, clicking on which you can get a result in the form of a man seduced. Kinks, fetishes and preferences vary in the extreme. If you simplify, to someone I prefer blondes, someone – brunettes, someone loves red. Some maddening plump, others deprived of will and mind hudyshki.
It seems that, unlike the metrosexual, the owner of “daddy’s body” will not be engaged in their appearance, and normal male chores like making money. Unfortunately, dad bod can not guarantee that your role in the family will be distributed in this way. Perhaps, instead of conquering the career ladder man walketh tum beer and TV.”
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Women also have their preferences – options that cause sexual desire. Many girls get turned on “daddy’s body.” And to answer the question “why is it?”, It is necessary to study the personal history of each of them: the formation of sexual facial features is influenced by many factors. So just accept – men “tum” sexually attracted to us. Apparently, I like to feel under his hand soft body is defenseless and touching. Or stroking his shoulders, feeling both muscle strength and a little fat. Perhaps this creates an attractive mix of strength and vulnerability, makes sexual partner in our minds, not only special, chosen, but ordinary, human.
Unfortunately, women are paying less attention to, to explore their sexuality in general, and to explore their sexual type in particular. Therefore, in the discussion of the phenomenon dad bod a lot about how to be a girlfriend or wife of a guy, but very little about the sexual component of the relationship. It is believed that women’s intimate life is not a priority. It is more important to engage with their appearance, ready to be a wife and mother.
If you “daddy’s body” is really excites you – this is normal. The difficulties begin when the drive is taken for something else – the need for security and stability, the desire to get married. Dad bod promises a lot of fun, but good sex without mutual attraction – too loud word. So, before you start hunting for a comfortable, home and safe “tum“, think: who really excites you to tremble at the knees.
Such a man corresponds to traditional ideas about partner
Next to the man who has a perfect body can be uncomfortable. Especially if you are far from ideal. We have all the time to try to reach out, catch up, fit, keep up. And if some women such competition can motivate personal growth, for others such competition with a private partner is too tedious. As if it is not clear who in this pair – a woman. Especially if a massage and pedicure man spends almost as much as his girlfriend.
It seems that, unlike the metrosexual owner of “daddy’s body” will not be engaged in their appearance, and normal male chores like making money. And as a reward for this will get you the “right woman” beautiful wife, almost ideal. Unfortunately, dad bod can not guarantee that your role in the family will be distributed in this way. Perhaps, instead of conquering the career ladder man tum carried away drinking beer in front of the TV. Better gym.
Such a man is predictable
Men love to say: “If you want to understand whether you well with your chosen one in 20 years, look at her mother.” If you now close to you spoiled princess with a refined taste, is looking at the potential mother in law, you can understand that after ten years fiancee will not queen, and a witch. In this man’s saying is common sense: women and the truth often enough eventually become like their mothers. Even if you are striving to do things differently, not like my mother.
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So, it seems that men are not tum! They do not try to meet the standards imposed by the successful person. Unlike fitness affiliates are not flexing its muscles on the beach, do not wear a tight T-shirt the first sun–boxers, do not look askance at gym, whether watching them with envy and admiration of other people. They do not tend to cheat: they correspond to the internal external. It seems that they are nothing of itself does not represent, do not try to jump over your head, do not splurge.
They now are what will become the majority of their peers after a couple years of marriage. They – normal guys, for which the family, normal operation, bought in auto loan and mortgage – life plan. And this normality impresses women, who, in a good, not too something and want to achieve over and enough to be “no worse than others.”Unfortunately, it is impossible to predict how you will feel after ten years of marriage or living together. It is likely that cozy little world with good and reliable husband, “like everyone else” will seem cramped. Or your dad bod suddenly cover the desire for change and anger that his world narrowed to job-cork-house. By law, meanness family, he decides what to blame his wife, meaning you
Counseling Psychology
In recent years, our society has a new psychological virus called “the right partner”. They were infected with not only women but also men. The huge number of web instructions, tips, texts, diagnostic techniques, dedicated to how to recognize the stranger suitable candidate to the “lived happily ever after and died in one day.” All these recommendations drown our intuition, the ability to feel both himself and another person, wean us enjoy the moment, flirting, gradual convergence.
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Assessing the man only by his appearance, we can make mistakes and end up in the trap of their own expectations. Having read the instructions and various typologies, women begin to communicate not with real, living men, and with some “psychological types.” We are waiting for that man will act in accordance with the prescribed him the role, and this is not happening. The result – disappointing for a disappointment, falling self-esteem, increased confidence to the men, and at the same time to all who “teaches us to live” on the Internet.